This Fitness Model Wants to Know, "What's Your Excuse?" for Your Average Body

A controversy exploded online recently over a California mom of three who posted the following photo on her facebook page:

Photo of Maria Kang by Mike Byerly

People freaked out when they saw this image. They accused her of fat-shaming women, being a bad mom and a bad person. I came across the story in this article on Yahoo. She's a fitness model, a former beauty queen, and a small business owner, and she claims she posted the image to provide inspiration for other women struggling with their weight. She says she wanted to encourage people to take responsibility for their own behavior and acknowledge the degree to which they are responsible for the state of their own bodies.

Okay - I take her at her word, and I certainly would never accuse her of being a bad mom or person for making a commitment to fitness in her own life. Clearly, she has done a great job! I have no issue with her desire to inspire. She makes part of her living off of trying to do just that and playing into the winds of the fitness industry, as do I.  I agree that, thankfully, we have a great deal of power over our own lifestyle choices, but that is where our similarities end.

At the core of the statement "What's your excuse?" is the assumption that we all strive to look like her, to be extraordinarily fit. It assumes that beauty is our highest ideal, rather than health. 

Putting aside all of the reasons why many people actually can't physiologically achieve that level of fitness (health problems, genetics, access to healthy food), even if we all could, would we want to? Would I want to get up at 6 a.m., do burpees and lunges while my kid hangs out at the playground, and never-ever watch TV as she does? Not really.

I exercise to maintain physical and emotional balance, not to achieve a predetermined, ideal image of a woman's body. I take no issue with Maria's choices in her own life and with her impulse to inspire others to better health, but I do think she is lost in a glorified, fitness mindset and a way of thinking about those of us who aren't striving for that particular "look." She presupposes that we are missing something and that we would be happier or more fulfilled if we lived life like she does. She presumes that we need an "excuse."

I walked in to the gym this morning, trying to think my way through her message and the explosion of responses she has received. I looked around the room at people of all shapes and sizes - women in particular - plugging away at the elliptical machines and weight benches, and I was actually moved to tears. These people were making an effort. They were there to take care of themselves, and they were both beautiful and lumpy in their sweaty spandex. 

What's missing from Maria's off-the-cuff question, "What's your excuse?", is an acknowledgement that beauty and health come in multitudes of shapes and sizes.

My clients, and the women of Body Baggage, work extremely hard to improve their health every day. Obesity causes physiological changes in the mind and body, and it's not always as easy as "deciding" to get in shape. (See previous posts on how difficult these changes can be and how to think about overcoming them here and here.)

Most of us are putting in a good faith effort to be healthy every day. Could we do more? Definitely, yes. Do we need an "excuse" for not dedicating our energies to being beauty queens? No. Most definitely not.

Five Reasons to Give Yourself a Break at the Gym

Photo - www.fitfluential.com

As a trainer, I hear a lot of not-so-convincing excuses for skipping workouts. Most of them are just that - excuses - but below are a few that totally justify giving yourself a break. 

1. You ache. – Your body hurts. There is fatigue in your bones so deep that your eyes burn at the thought of stillness and silence. Sleep. Rest. Your risk of injury is much higher when you and your muscles are spent.

2. You lost your keys twice this morning and poured orange juice on your cereal. – If you are spinning out, frazzled beyond recognition, and making it to the gym is PART OF THE ROUTINE, DAMN IT!!! Stop. Take a walk. Take as many walks as you can. Even 10 minutes will give you space to reorganize your thoughts.

3. Spin class blows. - You hate it. All your friends love it. You’ve tried, but you still hate it. Forget spin, and move on. Find something you love, but, whatever you do, don't give up! Just because you hate one type of exercise does not mean you will hate them all. You just need to find your perfect match.

4. Your Mom or your best friend just died. – Grieve and rage and be relieved. Go home, stare at the ceiling, and then take a trip somewhere. Go to Machu Picchu. Make her favorite sugar cookies. The gym is irrelevant immediately after a significant tragedy or loss, but, in the long run, exercise can help pull you through the grief and back into balance. Get back to it when you're ready.

5. You had a baby this week. – Give it a month or two. Listen to your doctor. Move as much as she says you can. Get out for fresh air as often as you can, and bring the baby. Get through the initial months of exhaustion, shock, and amazement. Life will return to normal eventually, and when you're ready to prioritize time for physical fitness again, you will know it.

One reason not to give yourself a break: 

You don’t feel like it. - If you allow yourself to skip workouts whenever you don't feel like it (and if you're anything like me), you will skip week-after-week, until you can't remember the last time you went to the gym. Deep down, we all have a pretty good idea whether we have a legitimate reason to take it easy or if we would really rather just have a snooze.

So when you are deciding whether to turn left toward home or right toward the gym, make sure to ask yourself if your reason for heading home is good enough or if it is just another excuse - and then (9 times out of 10), take a right.